Chris left Rosanna’s room smiling, leaving her to write some emails to her Internet friends. He was quite happy he thought, what a surprise to hear his fans wrote a story about him. And how very close to the truth they got about Tess being in my past. Whew! He was so happy it was all fiction. But fiction or no, he wonders what Diane will make of it.
Knowing Diane would be late coming in, he decided to catch up on some reading - so he headed for the study. He remembered a book one of his fan’s sent to him "The Hitchhikers Guide" by Douglas Adams and felt this would be a great time to look it over. He remembered there was a card in with it saying ‘ check out chapter #27’.
He read the chapter the fan wished him to read and started to laugh. He was thinking ‘how silly this computer was with its answer and couldn’t imagine what the answer could mean’. He started to feel a bit sleepy and thought just one more chapter and then he would lay his head back and rest till Diane came home. A short nap won’t bother anything, and this way he would be refreshed to hear all about Diane’s time with her friends.
Awe...this is so relaxing...just a short nap and then I will be refreshed...he started to smile remembering Diane told him he sometimes snored when he was in a deep slumber.
Chris felt restless and decided to go out for a "wee stretch of the legs". After several hours of climbing hills, jumping small streams, and climbing stone walls - things for which Ireland is greatly noted--, Chris finds himself staring at an ancient elfin stronghold. A circle fortress. Above the fortress like a blazing neon sign is a magnificent rainbow. The beauty of the colors so vivid as to burn the retinas of the eye. The western end of the rainbow touches the grounds in the exact center of the circle stronghold.
Chris, being well aware of the legends of the little people, knows that a leprechaun pot of gold waits at the end of the rainbow.
With a smile on his handsome face and humming Riding On A Rainbow, he heads down the meandering path, determined to find the leprechauns’ treasure. As he approaches the stronghold, Chris sees movement in the shadow of the stronghold entrance.
As he approaches the entrance, he spots tiny footprints in the undisturbed dust. Dust that would have taken hundreds of years to accumulate. Chris knows from the pristine surface of the dust that no one has been here for hundreds of years, maybe even thousands of years.
Chris starts to feel the excitement build up in his chest and trys hard to remember what he had heard of or read about the little people who would disappear when entering these strongholds.
Soon Chris makes a decision to follow the footprints. When not 10 feet into the diminishing corridor Chris feels something around his ankles. He can’t believe what is happening, but instantly he is hanging up side down, looking into the eyes of a wee little green clad man. The little man has pointed ears and a long gray beard half way down his chest. Eyes as black as the bottom of a well - for those of you who have never seen the bottom of a well, that’s pretty black--. The shoes on his tiny feet curl up at the toes, and there is a shimmering all about the tiny man, almost an illusion or a mirage in a scorching desert.
So here is Chris, wondering if now he could have fallen asleep, fallen into a slumber or is this really happening.
"After my pot of gold, are we?" the little man asks in a gruff voice. "Well, here you are and here you will stay" he tormented Chris hanging from the ceiling of the corridor.
Chris, knowing how serious the situation is, knowing how protective leprechauns are with their pots of gold, quickly replies, "The top of the morning to you little man".
To which the leprechaun answers, "And the rest of the day to yourself". His voice is deep and rough, almost malicious.
A dialog has started and Chris breathes a sigh of relief. Maybe he will survive if he can continue to talk to the little man. Chris feels it is a good start and thinks to himself, "What can I do now to get released?"
"So now little man, what can I do or say to convince you to let me down", Chris asks as the blood rushes to his head. "Soon I’ll pass out if I don’t get down from here."
While Chris is swinging back and forth like a pendulum, with his head about three feet above the ground, the little man rubs his beard as if to scratch an itch, thinking. "I’ll let you down if you can answer a riddle for me."
Throughout history leprechauns have always asked riddles, ridiculous riddles, sometimes even stupid riddles. The answers are equally ridiculous or stupid, but today Chris has no choice but to play the game.
"Very well", Chris answers, "but if I answer the riddle correctly, you have to not only release me, you also have to reward me with a pot of gold equal to my weight."
A smile appears on the leprechaun’s wrinkle covered face, "Not so fast my dangling gold stealing song singing foe. You are really not in a position to make demands hanging from the ceiling like you are. But I will offer a second opportunity to win a pot of gold if you should correctly answer the first riddle".
"But you must first let me down from here", Chris replies, "so as to have the full use of my brain which is quickly becoming numb hanging here like a side of lamb". Any opportunity to stand upright could not be overlooked if Chris wanted to escape.
The little man lets out a large loud laugh as he sprinkled magic elfin dust over and about Chris and in the flash of a blinding light and a kaleidoscope of colors our hero finds himself standing upright but with his hands tied behind himself with strong ribbons so as not to cause pain but to incapacitate.
"Let us begin", the little man says impatiently, the fun of the moment adding excitement to his voice.
"Before we begin", Chris says as he waits for the blood to circulate again in his head, "If I am to properly answer your riddle, shouldn’t I at least know your name, so I can tell of this story to my children back home. They are certainly going to enjoy spending your pot of gold as much as I am going to enjoy spending it."
Being a writer, Chris was well versed in playing mind games. Never before had he played mind games with a leprechaun, but he was about to find out if he could.
"My name is McAdams O’Douglas, please to make your acquaintance", he answered. "And I already know you are the famous Chris de Burg. If I weren’t in such a hurry to hang you back from the ceiling I would ask you to sing a few lines before I continue".
"But we must be doing our business, the first riddle is:" the leprechaun began in a formal tone, "What is the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe, and Everything?"
This question was quite absurd to Chris. "What kind of stupid question is this?", he asked.
"Don’t answer a riddle with another question", the laughing little man shouted back, "you cannot ask the questions, you have to answer them to gain your freedom."
The riddle baffled Chris, he knew lots and lots of useless information as well as useful information, the riddle he had to solve struck a note in his memory, it was on the tip of his tongue, but he was unable to bring the thought to the front of his mind. Try as he would, Chris was unable to answer the riddle.
"Hurry up", the gruff little man shouted, "we don’t have all day. You have to answer me the riddle or get hung back up to the ceiling. Hurry, hurry, hurry. I must be on my way."
Chris, still struggling to answer looked at the little man as a thought finally broke through the fog of his brain. "I know the answer" he thought. "The answer to your question is..."
"Out with it man", McAdams shouted, "the riddle needs to be answered. Hurry hurry hurry".
"You’re absolutely certain that you will let me go if I answer your question", Chris asked, "I don’t know if I can trust you. Particularly since we have so recently met".
"Yes, yes, yes. Of course you can trust me. I’m a man of my word", McAdams answered angrily, his wrinkled face turning red in the dim light of the corridor, "I’ll let you go the moment you answer my riddle, unless of course, you care to answer a second riddle to win a pot of gold. But remember, when you fail to answer correctly you will spend the remainder of your days swinging from the ceiling with the blood rushing to your head".
Chris knew the answer to the riddle. He began to sing his tune aloud, "We’re riding on a Rainbow, we’re flying free, we’re riding on a rainbow, yes you and me". The singing seemed to bring comfort to McAdams and finally Chris shouts out, "42".
What’s that you say?", McAdams asked.
"42" Chris replies.
"That’s correct", McAdams finally admits in a quiet voice, "you are absolutely correct" and the ribbons fall away freeing Chris’ hands.
"But of course I’m correct", Chris taunts the little man. The Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe, and Everything is 42 and I am now free to go".
How about the second riddle", McAdams quickly asks, "Are you ready for the second riddle to win the pot of gold you so desire?
A smug grin appears on Chris’ face. "A pot of gold the weight of which is equal to my own?".
"Yes, yes of course, the weight equal to your own" the little man agrees, "Here is the second part of the riddle".
Chris quietly stands, waiting for the little man to complete his game. "Hurry hurry hurry", Chris laughs, "I don’t want to be here all day".
"Well then", McAdams finally continues, "What is the meaning of 42".
WE LEAVE THE ANSWER AS AN EXERCISE FOR THE READER TO FILL IN.
Continuing with:
Chris is hurrying home whistling the tune Riding On A Rainbow, struggling under the weight of the gold dragged along behind him. With a satisfied grin on his handsome face knowing he just pulled off the mind game of his lifetime. He says to himself, "where now shall all this gold be donated:"
Chris...Chris...wake up honey...it’s me Diane. While shaking Chris awake and asking him why he is whistling to the tune "Riding On A Rainbow"? Chris, what in the world were you dreaming about anyway?!
